internetmessiah:

Hello, 911? *twirls phone cord around finger* sooooo how was your day? Did you arrest any bad guys?…No you hang up first! Hello? 911?

(via dat-boss-ass-bitch)

2treehill:

how do you get a nice body without moving

(via dat-boss-ass-bitch)

1103-bakers-street:

cryingbloodviolently:

redpancla:

when you get to school and realize you forgot to put on deodorant 

image

I AM SO FUCKiNG SICK OF TUMBLR

HOW THE FUCK CAN I RELATE TO THIS ARMADILDO

I DONT FUCKING KNOW BUT I CAN

I CANT TELL YOU HOW BUT I KNOW EXACTLY HOW THIS ARMADILLO FITS HERE FUCK TUMBLR YOUVE RUINED MY LIFE

armadildo

(Source: nerdjpg, via dat-boss-ass-bitch)

odair:

how is any of this considered blogging

(via death-by-lulz)

guroslime:

person : why do you draw everything facing left in 3/4 view

me : im a right handed mediocre artist 

(via arcticmonkfish)

daximed:

Hotel showers are really weird because they can range anywhere from “gently peeing on you” to “I fear for the safety of my nipples”

(via limelovely)

bonus:

i like to tell people when i need to go pee

(via classifried)

"I don’t know. I just feel stuck, like I’m afraid to take any steps in case they’re the wrong ones."

— Rebecca Stead, When You Reach Me (via cold-winter-days)

(Source: larmoyante, via cold-winter-days)